jack minaj
by mulberrybirthmark
Summary: Jack and the others have a very eventful day. very eventful,,,
1. jack is a minjaj

onec upon a time jack adn his tribe wer hunting for a pig. they wer lookign thru the forest butt htere were no pigs in sight! mauruci statred crying and roger hit hi m for being a baby. jack sed "hey roger dont do thta1! we aren not mean in theis trive we are loving and fai r to evry1." roger sed "ok" and they kept looking for a pig. jack then sadi "hey guyz i have someting 2 tel u…"

"what is it?! they all said in expectataion.

"I… am m….. NOT WHo U THINK I M!" he whpped off his mask to reveal nobody otehr than NICKI MANAJ!

"OMG u too?!" roger spoke up and toook of his mask nad they all saw he was really ARIANA GRANDE!

the other boyz spcreamed and ran amway bc they were sacared of girls.

jacka nd roger i mean nicki and ariana laughhd and high fiv'd. they ripped out of teiir 12 year old boy skins and reveld their tru whole bodies. they were wearing very glamrou s outfirs that i cant even describ becoaus theyre too beautiful for the human eye to ocmprehend. sorry.

but they awent to the beach and nicki went up 2 ralph and sed "hello yousre looking fine toady."

ralph gasped and said "nieki?! ur my idol I love NAAcondA!" they hugged and kissd in front of all da other boyz who ran away as fast ast heir little legsouc d cary them.

after every1 els wuz gone nicki started laugnhging like a happy meerkat…..

"whtas up" ralph asked curiosityly

"i TRICKD U! im actually really the real jack!" he whippd of his nicki manij skin and showd his REAL LIFE skin which is REALLY jack merridowe!

"NNNoOOOO!" ralph scraemad and fell 2 the ground in horor and embarrisment.

"haha im juts kidding " he stood up and pulld off his skin to show woh he really wuz….,,….. KIM KARDASIHAN!

jack gaspd.


	2. ralph is a kardashinshin

"soo….. u…. ar kim?!" jack began to cri like a big and fat and fat baby. he wantd ralph. and his mommy. "MOMMYYYY!" he cried..,,, roger/arinana gradne came frm the forest. "What."

'mommy im scard i wantef ralph and now its hes jim akardashin and this wont make the fangitrls happy and thsi wont wmake ANTONE happyy and idk i just cant deal w this take me to rock castle!'

"ok" rogergradnde pikd sad boy jack u p and ran offf 2 castel rok w him.

ledving kim kardashins to think about all ov her life chosies….

kim was sitting by the watur eand having existental crysis when simon came along! yay! simon i love simon . anyways simon sat next 2 kim and gave comfurt in the form ov nothing. literlly he did nothing.

"u know what imon! you are riht! just bc im ashmamed of bein ralph does NOT MEAN i should hide my real life face behind aa kardaishin!i habve to go tal kto jack right now!"

he stormd off like a stormy storm. whiping off his kim mask and body suiit as h e ran. "JACK! JACK!" he screemd aws he ran. and ran.

—

but alas. jak was nowhere to be fioudn. in fact, he was actually realy parytying his sadnis away w roger granday and theg ang. they had cookies and cake and unicorn bread and punc h bowls and brownines and cupcaks, and also som meat bc they lik meat a lot . jack was not rcrying anymor bc roger grande kept pattin hinm on thte head and saying "its ok" and they partyd nad they had fun without "KIM". maureec was chguggin a giant cartin of eggnogg when ralpfh crashinged in to the party. siimon behind him.

A"JACK MERIDOEW!I NEED TO TALK TO WYOU !"


	3. spoiler alert roger has an elephant

A/N: OH HW RTMY GO so greatfull for my fans!11111 11 you all are sos eooosso nicei to me adn i real lyapprecate it so *hugs* I luv you all! 3333333333 you relly all enspireme to keep writign! I LOVE U GUYZ!

and 2 the h8urz- BACK OFF IM JUST FAMOUS AND UR JELIS! THI SIS MY STORY AND I KEN DO WHUT I WANT W IT! XOXOXOXOO I HOPE U HAVE A GREAT LIFE AND LEARN HOW 2 APPRECIATE TALENT! JEZZZZ!

whehen jakc saw raph and simon come thru to crash hisparty, he wuz so confuzzled,…. he sed "kim? kim karadhin? wh ydo u look liek ralph again? i htought u were rlly kim….."

ralph sh ook his head an da small tear welleded up in his eyeball.

"no…" he sed. "im rlly actully ralph….. i wuz ashemmed and i now i learned that u gotta b urself and be who u r,…. i maynot be a kardashinshin but mayb i hope u will luff me anywey…" his eyez sparkled adn he looked up at jack w hopeful wide eyezs. jack lookd back with just as many teers in his eyes. they movd closer 2 each othr, not breakin eyeball contact tha hoole time, interlooking their fingners and moving v closer 2 each othr. then roger punchd ralff and ralph landed ontha floor. "that wuz a lame apology and i dont acept so gtfo." he sed. jeck lookd on in horror an d surpres.

ralp lookd up from tha flore and he ha d a blak n blu eyeball. he wuz cryin a lil bit bc rog er's punch hurt hard. he saw tha jellisy in roger'ss eyebals and ran outside tha party bc he didnt want 2 stay a party that he got punchd . he ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran and ran until hiz lil legs got tirrd and he wuz like "whut do i do now..,,,.. i lost mai boy and mai loyal fanbase…." and he broke down ry crying bawling, and he wishd jack wuz there w him to comflurt him…. nad then he hueard rustlni g behind him. he herd rustling the leeves weer rustling they wer making a rustlingsound. he turnd around hoping it wuz would be jackc but he knew it would probbabblby be saimon bc simon wuz alweysz around randomli when u didnt 1st expect it but he wuz nevr there when u actully wanted 2 kno where he wuz. soo he turnd arond expecting to c that lil boy shy byoy. AND guezz whut. IT WAZ NOT SIMON! it wus…rog ger! roggur on a big giantmungos ELEPHANT!


	4. puggy n demon r in this chap read it now

my friend who is a Girl friend sed she wants me to me put jack ninaj on her graveston and i cried for 5 weeks bc i lov that complemementn bc and so thats hwhy i didnt upate in long times.

as a sorry apologz note im writing this chapter xtra long for my loving beetyfil fans who i luV i lub u all oxoxxooxxoxooxo XD

ok. this is jack minjaj. this is fanfnaicion that is a fanfic. i wrote it,. and it is my rwrining. thank u.

ok lets go back 2 the storo there where roger has an ellephint. what is he gunna do w these elephant. is

ralph awatch ed the boi with the elliphant. he watchd him with horrur in his eyes and he didnt know how they but they sprinkled wit scarrdness. he knew this grey cretur witih giant cute ears and a hueg long sprinkle hose nose wood not be kindly to him. esppecilly becuz roger the bad big bad woas on top onside it.

he wass very scard and as he was scard he though of the red haired boy witt blue Sharpie eyes and giant freckles and perfictly stculpted facepaint and rippling hard rock abss and long strong noodlely arms and not safe for work. he grabbed his spear but he didnt have a speare so he did not GRAB bis spear. so then actually awht he did was he sat there starin gat elephepnt and thinking of bad thinks of Jack MErriwe. not bad thinks just thinks i cant write beczuz i rated this k ids and thats no t ok ay so stop talking to me i am going to murder my brain. so roger wuz laugihing like scar from lion kign and if u do not know lion king which would be very bad then go 2 this video www . y outube watch ?v=XkU23m6yX04 .

so aftur he laughed he was not looking anywhere but lokkin at ralph and then a giant foot came out and kicked him of the ellephat and then he fell on the GROUND! and then ralph was so scared and he was omg and then he wanted see who foot blelong to. guess who ofoot ebelnoged to. goot belonged to PUGGY IF ALL PEOPEL! piggy stuood triiunmpantly in trumph and he was the one who standed on the elephant now. he stoo d and looked at ralpf and then stuck out a hand 2 hlelp ralph get up . then he realized ralp couldnt reach im becuz he was on a giant elephint. so he got off the big gin t ellepaht and thne ehe was on the ground to so he help him stand up..

rapl did not cctake the hand of piggy he sto d up and he brush d off imaginray dirt dust from his ants. he sed "wow oroger is ded." piggy polshitd his specs and wuz prou d of himself becuz he savd a cheef boy. but chthis chef bo y onlee looked over at the dead body of roger that was a dead body that was killd by a foot in the air.

HE WENT OVER TO THe body and he sed "u kno he ded" and ralph lreally loves memes. then he poksd him with a sick ., he poked him with a stick so many times and piggy saud "RALPH! now iz not a true nice time for memEms!" (shoutout 2 my BESTESTS brother in the WHOLE WORLD his name is eli and he is piggy-lives on tumbler and he basicley WROTE THAT LINE and i stole it from him becuz i am so lovely and i saw it got a lot of notes so i knew that this amazing super an mznig cool fandom would all know my reference and i wuld be really in with the kool kidz! message me ! oxoxoxoxo everyone love my brother Eli!)

and ralph said nutthin as usual per and then he actully poked roger's eyeball with the stick! do u know what he said. he sed "this is symbolizsm. this is symbolismum for when u punchnd me away when i was making eyeball connection contact with my big Secret Crush jack merduld, and so whne n since u broke that eyeball connect chin i will BREAK UR ELYEBLALL!" and he had crazy looks in his eyes. and he raisd up the giant stick and he wuz about 2 stab rogur in eyeball and piggie screamed rella loudle and !

then roger wuz basically dean from supernatural idk who that is and he oepend up his ded eyebaalls and thety were alive eyeballs and !1 what happens next u will have 2 find out in the next chapter! of JACK MINAJ!


	5. Chapter 5 its cald chapter 5

ii d onut remember evebn where we left of in this storyie? wha t was hapening OH YEAH! elephand and ded roger wuz coming back 2 laif! ok! sO after that rogeer cums bak 2 life and bring me to life by evanescent is instrumantal in the backgruound. annnnnnd ralf gets scurrd bc thats scaree and then! ALL OF A DUDDEN!

he gaspeds and look at who it iz! PIGGY AZALEA! (credz to my best friend who iz some reviewer on named 'Nicole' yes yew are so smart for coming up with his im so proud be my best fred) piggy azalea is here 2 SAVE THE DAY! piggy azalea swoopses down annnnnndddd

and then he has a supernan cape! its made of underarm hair. and then he goes. and he saves ralph. roger cries.

rogger goes to burn some insense and he goes 2 je crie. he cries and cries and cries andnnndssndns hes crying becuz he got beat by piggy azaly. and simon cumz up 2 him with worryed eyeballs. he looks at him and he sez. he says "oh roger" and roger says nothing he just is stil cry and then. simon hugz him. (mai yaoi otp xD :3) and gues what happens next. you don't know becuz youre the reader and im the writer and i culd kill of all of dem and you culd do nuzzing about it! hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! HAHAHAnyways what happenz next is thh a t roger. roger hugs s s simon back. he hugs somin back and he hugs him and they are hugging and then simon says oh its okay piggy azalea doesnt want you to cry and neither do i you desurv to bee happee and we luv u roger we wuv yew rogie 333333333333 and rooger is actually blshushing a teeny bits. he gripz onto simon a littlest bit tighter. (do u liek that extru sensori detail i add ther.) they lean in2 each others faces. they tender kiss. they go out for fries

back wit piggy. ralf is crying becuz he feard rooger cumming back 2 laif. it wuz scary 2 watctch. but piggy azlal takes a micruphon and starts 2 spit...some ryhmez. piggz zalea singz "pictch m y pintn honna stping dis joint fjdiskfnrjsjxnd bfjxncc ccc c. street cred rap one to the papa boom no jooterang siggy o tigmhhy u djdbf" and ralf cries 5 times becus its so so beauyfull. and they are both crying and everyone is crying and jack is in the distunce fisting a pig


	6. Chapter 6

hi


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